Embracing depression

Its now 28 of February 2011, more than a week has passed since Absex visited me with his friend Al. It was depression, and I am not even sure of what I have written. If I am mumbling about the same things, my apologies. Likewise, my apologies that at times I only have pictures and the text or story is a bit behind. But, as someone have mentioned that its not fair that I am having this sex life - other aspects of my life is not exactly that blessed, so I could just smile.

Someone have even told me that I am nice, that I should have a lover and not be fucking around and having sex. Hmmmmm, that comment hurt until I learned he has no right to say that. It turns out that he is not even married with a baby daughter just another male guy with an official relationship and unofficial one, he is number one officially but having an affair with someone who is in a relationship! That was very sombering. Others may envy, others may pity, simply said, life is not the same for all of us, we have our ups and downs.

It was last week when someone, a national figure, committed suicide. And this week, a 70 yr old guy who became father again told me that no Filipino becomes depressed. We all have our moments, suicide have crept into my mind, I feel wasted, I feel useless. Dr. Margarita Holmes titled her latest book "Down to One", referring to the decreased sexual libido of her depressed husband - in my case, down to none? And yet when I would talk and meet my friends and visitors, I guess I am still lucky. I am 44 and I guess I only have limited time, I mean can I continue this active sex life till my golden age? I am just lucky in my genes that I have not so age or matured that I still pass for a person in his 30s!







But embracing depression is a struggle, and so with friends still wanting to take advantage of my fun place, why not? Thus, absex was most welcome last week's wednesday with his friend. Hmmmm, how shall I describe Al? He is fair with a slight belly and seems to be horny as hell. He said he had not had sex for a while since his wife is pregnant ... only he answered that the wife is only 3 months pregnant after the sex. Oh yeah.. yeah right! Some people do find it hard to admit they enjoy, that they love male sex!

And how was the male sex for me? Nice, very, very nice.







09 February 2011, Wednesday.